Huge Hope Factors
I wanted to recap just a few of the things I've been thinking about since first finding out that sweet little G man has Leukemia.
You know how my word for the year is HOPE. {See here for explanation}
Well, there is just so much HOPE written all over this journey for Sara and her boys {and by boys I also throw in there her amazing husband, Charito.} Here are just a few things to be thankful for:
1. Grayson had blood work done just 4 weeks prior to the intensive blood work which led to the ALL diagnosis. The fact that they had a baseline to measure against is really helpful. HUGE HOPE FACTOR. Most families fighting this ugly disease don't have that indicator.
2. The fact that back in June, when Sara's 'gut' was telling her that something just wasn't right, and that even though the doc said they'd do extensive blood work at his 2-year appointment this fall, that she went ahead and had it done when she did. That put them several months ahead of the game. Catching it early is a HUGE HOPE FACTOR.
3. The initial bone marrow tests showed that it was in 85% of his marrow. And get this, just this past Monday, as in 4 days ago, when they did another bone marrow test, it was in under 10% of his marrow. The chemo is working. Yet again, another HUGE HOPE FACTOR.
I got to spend some time with Sara and her 3 little guys this week and let me just stop for a minute and say that I FORGOT MY CAMERA. And I'm so irritated with myself. Baby Caden is SO adorable. I mean, he's a little "Sara" with a fun spikey thick head of black hair. So sweet. You know when they just curl up and are so tiny and you forget that your own were that tiny. Ya, just precious. Made me want another one for about, oh, a nano-second, until she mentioned she hadn't slept the night before because of a gassy tummy. And, we're done. But I'll babysit! For sure.
And then there was Triston. Jackson's favorite little bud. I miss him. He makes me laugh and sort of shake my head in awe at how smart he is. I mean, I'm not kidding when I say that some day, because of all this and through all this, he will be a medical doctor, and my guess is he'll be a children's pediatric oncology doc. He loves his brother so. It wouldn't surprise me if he decides very early on that he wants to fight against leukemia.
And then, sweet Grayson. Okay, first of all, it was all I could do to not burst into tears when I saw him. Maybe it was just the relief of seeing him. In his own home. Walking around. Eating french fries. And I guess the desire to burst into tears sort of took me by surprise {and I know all you out in blogland are saying, "Um, Alysa, you cry at EVERYTHING, why would this surprise you?"}
But the reality is, he looked perfectly fine. His smile was a mile wide. He just was Little G. But for some reason, as I saw him, for a split second I just thought, "Why? It's so not fair." But the reality is, we'll never know and we just simply cannot dwell on that for long. For a season, maybe. We have to be real and ask the questions and feel the doubt and worry and wonder why. But again, I'll hang my hat on this peg. This is a hill I will die on: God is STILL good. He loves Grayson more than any of us could ever imagine and while it doesn't make any bit of sense that a 21 month old could come down with leukemia, we can't get stuck on the why's and what if's, but rather the whats and what now. What do we know about God? His character? His HOPE. His peace. His love. And what will we do to focus on those things? {Way over-simplified but that's the gist of what I've been thinking about. Still hard and do not want to minimize this at all. A tricky balance I suppose.}
Anyway, Grayson flashes this smile that absolutely will melt your heart. I am sure, when he turns 16 he will say to his daddy, "Convertible?" And Charito will be all over it, saying, "What colour G-man?" Seriously, it's a bit dangerous. I thought Jackson had the market on the melt-your-heart-smile. Apparently, Grayson does, too.
And so, Sara and I had a nice visit and I sat there in amazement at how calm she remained when an infant was crying, Grayson was calling her name and Triston was needing a toy. She just patiently went from one to the other, never riled up. No wonder she's a preschool teacher {and a darn good one at that}.
Sara has said that I could share the link to her personal blog on Grayson "Our Boy Wonder". Click here to read her posts. Thank you for your continued prayers for this family. God will sustain them through this journey. I have HOPE and confidence that God can completely heal Grayson of this leukemia, and in the process, through this, I believe we can each come to know Him better, which ultimately is a really cool thing to do!
You know how my word for the year is HOPE. {See here for explanation}
Well, there is just so much HOPE written all over this journey for Sara and her boys {and by boys I also throw in there her amazing husband, Charito.} Here are just a few things to be thankful for:
1. Grayson had blood work done just 4 weeks prior to the intensive blood work which led to the ALL diagnosis. The fact that they had a baseline to measure against is really helpful. HUGE HOPE FACTOR. Most families fighting this ugly disease don't have that indicator.
2. The fact that back in June, when Sara's 'gut' was telling her that something just wasn't right, and that even though the doc said they'd do extensive blood work at his 2-year appointment this fall, that she went ahead and had it done when she did. That put them several months ahead of the game. Catching it early is a HUGE HOPE FACTOR.
3. The initial bone marrow tests showed that it was in 85% of his marrow. And get this, just this past Monday, as in 4 days ago, when they did another bone marrow test, it was in under 10% of his marrow. The chemo is working. Yet again, another HUGE HOPE FACTOR.
I got to spend some time with Sara and her 3 little guys this week and let me just stop for a minute and say that I FORGOT MY CAMERA. And I'm so irritated with myself. Baby Caden is SO adorable. I mean, he's a little "Sara" with a fun spikey thick head of black hair. So sweet. You know when they just curl up and are so tiny and you forget that your own were that tiny. Ya, just precious. Made me want another one for about, oh, a nano-second, until she mentioned she hadn't slept the night before because of a gassy tummy. And, we're done. But I'll babysit! For sure.
And then there was Triston. Jackson's favorite little bud. I miss him. He makes me laugh and sort of shake my head in awe at how smart he is. I mean, I'm not kidding when I say that some day, because of all this and through all this, he will be a medical doctor, and my guess is he'll be a children's pediatric oncology doc. He loves his brother so. It wouldn't surprise me if he decides very early on that he wants to fight against leukemia.
And then, sweet Grayson. Okay, first of all, it was all I could do to not burst into tears when I saw him. Maybe it was just the relief of seeing him. In his own home. Walking around. Eating french fries. And I guess the desire to burst into tears sort of took me by surprise {and I know all you out in blogland are saying, "Um, Alysa, you cry at EVERYTHING, why would this surprise you?"}
But the reality is, he looked perfectly fine. His smile was a mile wide. He just was Little G. But for some reason, as I saw him, for a split second I just thought, "Why? It's so not fair." But the reality is, we'll never know and we just simply cannot dwell on that for long. For a season, maybe. We have to be real and ask the questions and feel the doubt and worry and wonder why. But again, I'll hang my hat on this peg. This is a hill I will die on: God is STILL good. He loves Grayson more than any of us could ever imagine and while it doesn't make any bit of sense that a 21 month old could come down with leukemia, we can't get stuck on the why's and what if's, but rather the whats and what now. What do we know about God? His character? His HOPE. His peace. His love. And what will we do to focus on those things? {Way over-simplified but that's the gist of what I've been thinking about. Still hard and do not want to minimize this at all. A tricky balance I suppose.}
Anyway, Grayson flashes this smile that absolutely will melt your heart. I am sure, when he turns 16 he will say to his daddy, "Convertible?" And Charito will be all over it, saying, "What colour G-man?" Seriously, it's a bit dangerous. I thought Jackson had the market on the melt-your-heart-smile. Apparently, Grayson does, too.
And so, Sara and I had a nice visit and I sat there in amazement at how calm she remained when an infant was crying, Grayson was calling her name and Triston was needing a toy. She just patiently went from one to the other, never riled up. No wonder she's a preschool teacher {and a darn good one at that}.
Sara has said that I could share the link to her personal blog on Grayson "Our Boy Wonder". Click here to read her posts. Thank you for your continued prayers for this family. God will sustain them through this journey. I have HOPE and confidence that God can completely heal Grayson of this leukemia, and in the process, through this, I believe we can each come to know Him better, which ultimately is a really cool thing to do!