Celebration of Life

Friday was a beautiful sunny day, just as it should have been for such a special lady's memorial service. Alice wrote here about her mother's service and rather than re-tell it, I'll just let you go over and read what she wrote. Brilliant as always.

I arrived at the church rather early and the first person I saw was Mr. Nichols. And he gave me the biggest, longest hug and as you can probably imagine, I cried. Couldn't help myself. I had planned to be strong and not cry. Who was I kidding?

And then, someone approached us and so he turned and introduced me and said the kindest, most meaningful thing he could have said. "This is Alysa. She's one of Alice's dearest friends from college. And she's like a daughter to us." Ya, I lost it again. That just made me feel so, so good. So loved.

You know when deep inside you feel like someone is family to you, but then you think to yourself, "Well maybe I just think I'm sort of like family to them but maybe they don't really see me that way. Maybe I'm just like any other person to them." So when he verbalized that it just spoke to that past college kid in me who was far away from her own family at the time, and who was taken in and treated as family by these dear, dear people. And not only does that speak volumes about Mr. and Mrs. Nichols, it also says the same about Alice; she shared her family with me. What a gift. Giving someone the gift of your family. {And on this topic I could write volumes but will withhold for now. But I promise to revisit it because it is such a significant part of my life and who I am today. God has given me the gift of so many loving families who have swallowed me up and made me part of their own.}

{Here's sweet Lucy.}

The whole service, start to finish, was beautiful; a taste of heaven. And perfectly Mrs. Nichols. The way she would have wanted it. While it was about her, the reality is, it really wasn't about her at all. It was about her Jesus. Just the way she would have wanted it. I can't think of a more humble, beautiful, teeny tiny, gentle, loving and kind-spirited person. And all those soft qualities were tucked inside this amazingly strong lady. A woman of prayer. A woman that lived in anticipation of the day she would meet her Jesus. And June 16th, she did just that. She walked into the loving arms of her sweet Savior, the one that paid the price for her sins so that she could live forever with Him. The reason she lived her life.

I couldn't help but glance over at Mr. Nichols throughout the service. I'm not sure why except I just couldn't help thinking, "What is he thinking right now?" and "How does someone lose their best friend 1 day short of 44 years of marriage?" It seems almost impossible to handle. And then I would be thrown back into the reality of his faith, and mine, too, which says that we don't grieve as the world grieves, without hope. We have that Hope.

The very last picture in the video was just perfect. It was of Mr. and Mrs. Nichols, walking through a garden, holding hands, mid-stride, smiling and laughing. Together. And I couldn't help but think that some day, they will be reunited and will walk hand-in-hand, smiling and laughing, through a garden, mid-stride once again. Together for all eternity. A beautiful picture of the Hope we have for those of us that know Jesus as our loving Redeemer.

Hands down, the highlight of the service for me was the final song - In Christ Alone. Alice had asked some of us to get up and sing, 'choir style' and I have to say, it was an amazing, powerful experience. I had prayed like crazy leading up to the day, that I wouldn't just cry through the whole thing, because a) music moves me, especially in a memorial service and b) this is one of my favorite songs {we sang it at Jackson's dedication service} and c) let's just be honest, I tend to be a cry baby.

I did choke up once or twice, looking down at Alice's dad and also glancing beside me to Alice, but honestly, I found myself lost in worshipping Jesus and imagining the angels just singing alongside us. It has to be one of the highlights of my life. It really does. I swear, everyone was singing at the tippy top of their lungs and the harmony was beautiful. People were full on smiling. It just was the perfect way to end the service. Full of joy. And Hope. And Peace.

And with that I will transition into a completely non-spiritual, non-related event. A random memory as I'm sitting here writing this post.

So when Alice arrived at the church, she told how she had basically threatened the girls within an inch of their lives that they needed to leave their pony tails IN. Don't touch the ribbon. Don't take out the pony tails. When we leave after the luncheon you can then remove the pony tails. Then and ONLY then. You get the idea. Leave the pony tails and ribbon IN your hair.

Bottom line.

And I have to say, they looked simply darling on the way into the service. Walking hand-in-hand with their Packa between them. Pony tails perfectly aligned. Ribbon tied just so.

And then the service ended.

Alice and the girls were ushered out of their pew and honestly, I laughed out loud {quietly of course} as I saw Lucy and Elaine.

No pony tails.

No ribbon seen within a 5 pew radius.

Hair askew.

But at the end of the day, who cares.

Because they still looked adorable and they were so well behaved during the service.

And their sweet Manga would have been so, so proud of her girls. All 3 of them. Because that's the type of grandma and mother she was; always encouraging, always teaching, always smiling. She loved her Alice more than you could possibly fathom. It was visible on her face when they were together. No one could get Mrs. Nichols to chuckle like Alice could. Alice just tickled her mother so and she was SO proud of the woman Alice had become. The wife. The mother. The home maker and outside-the-home maker that her daughter was, and is.

Mrs. Nichols was one special lady and in her honor I kept my lipstick mostly on, all day long {which is no small feat for me. I'm a once-a-day-application type gal. *Alice gasps and shakes head as if to say, Did you not learn ANYTHING from my mother*}.

After the service, driving away from the church, I couldn't help but smile. I pulled over to open the special gift Mrs. Nichols had asked Alice to give me. A beautiful cross necklace and handkerchief. That's when I full on lost it. As in sobbed. I will treasure that gift always.

I'm so sad that she's gone. But I cranked the classical music, wound along the river, and thought back through so many great memories made on Blanchard Street. Sitting on the kitchen stool sharing boy woes. Sipping ice tea on the back patio. Watching movies on the sun porch. Generally being 'refined' by classical music and fine art and literature and everything else proper, all at the hands of the Nichols family.

What a joy that family is to me. God is good, even in the midst of loss.

God is good.